Happy Birthday Daddy. I hope that wherever you are you will be having a good knees up today.
I was actually due on your birthday and I arrived into the world exactly a week late. Mum told me how you rocked me and sung to me for hours after I was born and said I was the best birthday present you’d ever had. We’d always get so excited in the run up to our birthdays and loved celebrating them together.
This story is continued from my last post, The Trauma of a Difficult Birth.
I stayed in hospital for four days after Thomas was born. Much of it was a blur, I was tired and ill. I remember the feelings of joy, pride and disbelief mixed in with the fear and pain. I couldn’t believe my beautiful baby was finally here, he was all mine and I was responsible for looking after him. People talk about the intense you feel for your baby instantly, nothing could have prepared me for the intensity of love I felt surge through my body.
In this post I open up about the trauma of a difficult birth. If you are squeamish it probably isn’t one for you…
I had a wonderful pregnancy; very little morning sickness and I didn’t put much extra weight on. The only thing I struggled with was pelvic pains towards the end as my bump was so huge and swollen feet and ankles (or cankles!). People commented on how I was glowing and I did feel on top of the world for most of it. It really is a miracle to feel your baby growing inside you.
Here it is again… guilt.
I feel so guilty leaving my baby this morning that I want to cry. My nearly two year old is going through a very clingy “Mamma” phase at the moment, it’s sweet and makes me feel very loved but it also makes it so difficult to leave him to go to work.